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Writer's pictureCatherine Valliere

Healing Damage and Trauma

Updated: Apr 17, 2023


the silhouette of a water color woman surrounded by butterflies with the quote do the best you can until you know better. then when you know better, do better by maya angelou

Healing damage and trauma doesn't mean the wounds never existed, despite common perception to the contrary. We certainly don't live in a perfect world where trauma and/or damage never occur.


Actually, the concept of healing is quite distinct. This means that the harm is no longer dictating how you live. I'll say it again for the folks in the back: THE DAMAGE DOESN'T CONTROL YOUR LIFE.

Let me be clear: I am not claiming that burying the past is simple. I can attest to that fact. A typo I tweeted unintentionally followed me around for days. Everyone has their own unique set of traumas and problems that can feel like a mountain that's impossible to climb.

But here's the thing: Dwelling on the hurt simply serves to amplify it. Trying to do so is like keeping a beach ball submerged. One day, it will suddenly appear and hit you square in the face. I was once there and got the t-shirt to prove it, believe me, I get it.

Recovery takes time. It's going to require some deep breathing, calm contemplation, and time. The effort will be rewarded. When you release the past for good, you liberate yourself and make way for the future.

Holding on to past hurts and regrets can weigh us down and prevent us from moving forward. By letting go, we create space for new opportunities and experiences to come into our lives.


Remember that while wounds can heal, that doesn't mean they never existed when you next feel overwhelmed by the past. It simply means that the harm is no longer dictating how you live. And if all else fails, simply relax and think back to the moment in third grade when you called your teacher "mom." You can handle anything else if you can make it through it.

My mom, my dad, and three bonus parents (yes, five) raised me. They raised me at a time when getting along for the sake of the kids was not a concept. That led to a lot of confusion for me, really into my late adulthood. The lack of understanding and communication between my parents affected my emotional well-being and relationships with others. My parents' conflict made me feel very confused, which took a long time to get over.

In the end, fortunately, my two sets of parents have now been married for over 35 years each. And I have a healthy, happy relationship with each one; that was after years of therapy and self-care. Meeting a very patient love of my life helped heal me as well.

I am a better person now and wake up each day, grateful for the progress I have made and for the people that supported me along the way. I now feel more equipped to handle any challenges that may come my way.

In conclusion, we all have trauma and damage, some greater than others. At the end of the day, regardless of our struggles, we are each responsible for finding our own peaceful, healed path and, beyond that, rejecting people and things that would cause us damage moving forward.

It is important to seek help and support from loved ones or professionals if needed. Always try and remember life is a journey, not a destination, and it takes time and effort to heal past trauma and damage.


Remember to Simply Breathe!

A'ho Dawk'ee - Namaste

Cat V.


DISCLAIMER:


A'ho Namaste creates peace movement content and this information is not presented by a medical practitioner and is for educational and informational purposes only. The content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified healthcare provider with any questions you may have regarding any type of mental or physical issues. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read.



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